>>murah gile..!

cuba korg teka.. berapa harga mende alah ni.. teka la.. teka la..

.

..

...

....

.....

......

.......

........

.........

..........

teeeeet...

 masa dah tamat.. 

jawapan yg betul dan tepat adalah RM14.90..!

giler murah weyh.. shampoo+conditioner+body wash =RM14.90..? serious ke nih..? sumpah xcaye.. pastu aku tanya la pekerja kat situ.. dia kata dengan yakinnya.."ya.. ini memang harganya.. kita nk habiskan stok sebab pek ni pek promosi masa christmas yang lepas.."

wait.. chop3x..! dove bukan ke baru jek tukar skin..? and yes.. ini skin baru okay..! thats mean the chirstmas promotion adalah tahun lepas jek.. ala.. baru 3 bulan beb.. harga dia jatuh menjunam lebih half price..? siyes mmg susah giler nk caya..

selalunya kalau beli satu2..
shampoo = RM15.80
conditioner = RM15++
body wash =RM 8
hurm.. korang pun terror kan tambah tolak ni.. kira la berapa byk untung beli bende alah ni.. untung gila..! kan..?

kat mana nk beli benda murah ni..? kat mana lagi.. x lain x bukan kat Watson Midvalley Megamall.. huhuhu..

p/s: smpai sekarang rasa mcm xcaya je murahnye..

>>seksi or seksa..??

dalam hati mana2 perempuan.. mustahil la kan xnak kelihatan seksi..? kan..? kan..? kan..? eleh.. xmo ngaku la tu.. tapi sebenarnye nak kan..? aku pun termasuk dalam salah satu dari kategori tersebut.. ni sume hasil daripada terlalu melayan kpop la ni sejak TVXQ in hiatus.. sekarang ni TVXQ dah buat comeback.. lantas mereka la satu2nye kpop idol yg aku layan sekarang ni.. aku dh cut all the ties with other kpop idols.. yeorobeun, mianhe..!! sorry everyone..! now in my mind only have space for Changmin, Yunho, Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu..

ok back to the title.. seksi.. mmg yer..! aku ngaku.. aku teringin gile nk pakai seksi2 mcm nih:

pergh.. tgk tu.. seluar bukan main pendek lagi.. kan..? ni baru satu.. kalau tgk kpop 2009 and 2010.. bersepah2 artis dorg pakai seluar mcm ni.. rasa mcm cantik je.. dh jadi tend la katakan.. kan..? so dengan ini kaum adam pun apa lagi.. paham2 je la.. betul x..? tu baru kes seluar.. belum kes bhgn atas lagi.. betul x..?

aku nk pakai mcm ni..? aku..?  biar betul..? yer.. mmg aku ada keinginan nk pakai mcm ni pun. aku ngaku.. ala.. aku pun bukan nye baik sgt kan.. tapi.. aku xpakai pun cm ni.. sebabnye..? aku termalu sendiri.. bayangkan la.. dok berkemban dari toilet ke bilik pun aku segan.. ni nk pakai seksi2..? mmg sorry la.. 

lagi satu.. mmg senang je nk pujuk diri sendiri.. ckp mcm ni kt diri sendiri.. "ko nk tunjuk2 sume ni buat apa..? ko bukannya lawa pun.. daripada ko tunjuk.. baik ko simpan je.. lagi valuable.. kan..?"

hurm.. kadang2 tu teringin jugak nk free hair.. buat keje gila.. nk jugak aku stail2 kan rambut ni.. tapi xde la samapi tahap nk kaler sume.. setakat rebonding je..fyi,, abg aku penah suruh aku pergi rebond, tapi buat ape pergi rebond..? aku pakai tudung ikat rambut nanti rosak la rebond nye.. ye x.?? lgpun dia suruh je.. bukan nk hulur duit.. mmg aku x buat la kan.. hahaha..

 bab2 nk dedah sana dedah sini tu.. aku selalu ingt perumpamaan ni:

wanita ini umpama lolipop.. jadi kamu pilih.. kamu nk jadi lolipop yg tertutup itu atau lolipop yg dah terbuka..? pilih sendiri la.. terpulang pada hak masing2.. tapi jgn lupa.. kita ni hak Allah.. ingat tu.. cume lagi satu ayat yg aku tambah sendiri.. lolipop yg tertutup tu.. kamu nk jadi yg elok tutupan nya or ade terkoyak2 sikit balutan tersebut..? lu pikir la sendiri..! *ayat femes nabil raja lawak* err.. aku pun bukannye 100% tutup pun. but at least i try.. right..? *terasa sendiri..*

okay.. renung2kan dan selamat beramal..!

(^_^)v

>> i'm Maher Zain's fan now..

okay.. aku agak ketinggalan zaman sikit.. tp siyes.. lagu2 Maher Zain mmg best.. terlalu bersahaja tapi mesej dia ada.. *bersahaja ke..?* dan bila tgh mood2 depress ke ape.. best dgr lagu nih.. InsyaAllah..

dan serius xsangka.. quotes yg selalu aku baca depan mata aku ni adalah lirik lagu nih.. 

"Every time you can make one more mistake, you feel you can't repent, and that its way too late, you're so confused, wrong decisions you have made, haunt your mind and your heart is full of shame.. don't despair and never loose hope, cause Allah is always by your side.. InsyaAllah.."

lyrics: 

Every time
You feel like you cannot go on
You feel so lost and that you're so alone
All you see is night
And darkness all around
You feel so helpless you can't see which way to go
Don't despair
And never lose hope
'Cause Allah is always by your side

Chorus:
Insha Allah
Insha Allah
Insha Allah
You'll find your way

Every time
You commit one more mistake
You feel you can't repent and that it's way too late
You're so confused
Wrong decisions you have made
Haunt your mind and your heart is full shame
But don't despair
And never lose hope
Coz Allah is always by your side
Chorus

Turn to Allah
He's never far away
Put your trust in Him
Raise your hands and pray
Ya Allah
Guide my steps, don't let me go astray
You're the only one who can show me the way
Show me the way
Show me the way
Show me the way

InshaAllah
InshaAllah
InshaAllah
We'll find the way

in conclusion.. ingat2 lah Allah selalu.. (^_^)v

p/s: lagu for the rest of my life pun best jugak.. sesuai bagi suami nk nyanyi utk isteri.. sgt sweet.. touching giler kalau suami aku buat mcm tu nanti.. sobs3x.. terharu beb.. 

please change the date..

*click the picture to have a larger view..*

peace..! (^_^)v

current mood: tgh xbetul ngadap assignment MATLAB.. haha.. ini la hasilnye.. =p

>> minggu yang penuh dengan test..

huwaaa..!!

nape la sume subjek nk buat test minggu ni..

selasa 22/2/2011

further life contingencies

chapter: loss at issue until reserves

*okay..reserve sgt susah.. pening..*

khamis 24/2/2011

12pm : introduction to computer in mathematics (MATLAB)

tutorial 1-3..

*pergh.. nasib baek smpai 3 jek.. sebab start tutor 4 aku dh pening gile2.. pengsan~*

4pm: monte carlo

chapter: 0-1

*chapter 0 okay lagi.. chapter 1..?? errkk...*

next week: 

2/3/2011

survival data analysis

tutorial 1-4

*tapi lecturer tibe2 pergi meninggalakn kami terpinga2 di sini.. how..?*

gile stress..

rasa mcm final la pulak..

=_="

azam minggu ni..

nk study..

nk tutp lappy xmo bukak2 unless nak buat matlab or monte carlo..

*eleh.. kalo dah sekali bukak tu mcm2 la aku buat nanti..*

nak menjauhkan diri sari sume org..

kalau agak2 xdpt khabar berita dari aku..

maksudnye tu.. paham2 je la yek..

abaikan equation di atas ni.. mengarut jek lebih.. =_="

>> Kejora & Bintang vs Shining Inheritance

korg tgk x drama bersiri indonesia KEJORA & BINTANG..?

dan pernahkah anda tgk drama korea yg bertajuk SHINING INHERITANCE..??

 
untuk pengetahuan semua.. jalan cerita kedua2 cerita tersebut sgt2 la sebijik dan sama..! gila ke ape..? siapa tiru siapa nih..?? kejora & bintang tahun bila..? kalau shining inheritance tu tahun 2009 kalau x silap.. hurm.. kalau la indon ni meniru cerita korea.. xkan la dorg dah xde idea dah kot..? pelik sungguh..

jalan cerita dia mmg sejibik gedebuk mcm tuh.. fyi.. antara byk2 cerita korea.. ni la satu2nye cerita yg gile meleret2 sampai penat aku tgk.. 28 episod tuh.. normal punya cerita selalunye 16 episod je.. tu pun dah kira byk dah.. mungkin sebab tu la kot cerita indon mcm senang je nk copy paste cerita nih..

persamaan dua2 cerita ni:

1. ayah kepada heroin tu kawin lagi lepas mak si heroin tu meninggal..
sebelum ayah dia 'mati' hidup dorg bahagia.. tapi lepas ayah dia 'mati'.. mak tiri + kakak tiri heroin tu halau si heroin dan adiknya keluar dari rumah..

2. sebenarnye.. ayah heroin tu x mati pun..
dia dianggap mati.. sebabnye..? pada suatu malam.. si ayah ni terlalu tensen lalu pergi ke kelab malam.. kebetulan.. time tu si ayah ni terlalu banyak hutang keliling pinggang.. tambahan pula beliau hampir2 bankrupt.. so.. pergi la berjoli release tensen.. nak dijadikan cerita.. tiba2 kelab tersebut terbakar.. tapi si ayah ni sebenarnye x mati.. dia dianggap mati sebab ic dia ade kat sorg mamat yg pakai brg dia, kalau  silap aku.. mamat ni pencuri.. curi barang si ayah tu la.. dia yg mati kat dlm kelab tersebut.. hurm.. memandangkan si ayah ni ada insurans yg terlalu byk yakni berjuta-juta rupiah mahupun korea won.. so dia mendiamkan diri.. dan merelakan dirinya dianggap mati.. teeet.. *xpernah terpikir pun kan cite korea pun ade mcm nih..?*

3. one day.. si ayah tersebut kembali mencari anak beliau..
yakni si heroin dan adiknya.. pastu beliau jumpa dengan janda beliau yakni si mak tiri.. mak tiri ckp kat dia yg anak dia 2 orang tu pergi ke luar negeri.. hidup diorang okay jek.. padahal dorg pun xtaw la ape cer dua orang tu sebenarnye.. pastu mak tiri ni pun ugut la ayah dia supaya jangan selalu muncul depan dorang lagi.. kalo x report polis.. ye la kan.. kesalahan si ayah ni bukan main2.. menipu dia dah mati.. what the.... serius beb kes ni.. pastu mak tiri bagi ayah duit suruh pergi jauh2.. dan ayah pun ckp.. "aku xnak duit ni.. aku cuma nak pastikan anak2 aku okay je.." sejibik beb sejibik..!

4. kakak tiri minat kat hero..
pastu suruh heroin merahsiakan hubungan dorg..

5. watak hero yg sama..
useless guy at first.. but after meet the heroin.. he somehow change to somebody useful.. *hahaha.. gile kejam ayat aku ni..* perangai pun sama.. poyo2 mcm tu.. xreti buat kerja apa2..

6. watak hero ke-2 lebih kurang sama..

7. adik heroin tu x berapa nak normal sgt..
ade penyakit mcm something.. in simple words.. not like a normal person.. cuma watak adik dalam cerita korea adalah lelaki.. tapi dalam cerita indon adik dia pompuan.. kalau dalam cerita korea.. adik dia ada satu talent.. yakni terror main piano.. cerita indon ni aku xtaw la..

8. heroin & adiknya terpisah sebab mak tiri dan kakak tiri.. heroin punyalah berusaha sungguh mencari adiknya.. dh nk jumpa je lost contact balik.. jumpa je lost balik.. begitu la hendaknya.. nanti ast2 hero yang menyatukan mereka berdua kembali..


kalau cerita korea pun aku dah penat tgk yg 28 episod tu.. apatah lagi cerita indon yg boleh meleret2 sampai beratus-ratus episod.. huh.. siyes penat.. ni pun mak aku yg cerita pasal cerita Kejora & Bintang ni.. sebab mak aku mmg gila tgk cerita indon sikit.. aku suka korea.. mak aku suka indon.. hah.. bagus sgt la tu.. yg lain normal jek.. geleng kepala tgk aku ngan mak aku kalau depan tv.. hehehehe.. ye la.. dah pegang control tv dan dah ready depan tv ni.. mmg mintak maaf la sgt kalau nk buat keje lain.. hehe.. mak borek anak rintik.. peace..!

(^_^)v

>> happy birthday, my love..♥♥♥♥

can you tell what day is today..? hurm.. let me tell you a brief of the story..

23 years ago.. on 18th February 1988.. a gorgeous looking little boy were born.. who is it..? do you know who..??

of course..! it's my lovely honey..! Shim Chang Min..!!♥

심창민,

생일 축하 합니다..!!

saengil chukha hamnida..!! 

happy birthday..!!

aigoo.. you're 23 years already.. *in korea you are 24* so fast la you grown up.. love you forever, changmin oppa..! ~♥♥♥

for you guys information.. this year is the first time ever i had done something that i've never done before.. guess what..? i made a birthday card and sent it to him..! of course la via some organization.. because i don't have direct address of his home.. owh.. how much i wish i know his family' home address.. for sure i'll do visit there.. coz i'm his very-future-wife-to-be.. *berangan lagi..!* hahaha.. 

kan best kalau dapat potcard siap ada tanda tangan dari dia mcm gmbr ni kan..? huhu.. gile best..

okay.. xleh nk meleret panjang2 nih.. encik Life Contingencies dah memanggil2 saya nih.. err.. kan best kalau changmin boleh ajar aku LC sampai master.. hehehe.. okay.. tata..! (^_^)v

[My Story] : Chapter 2 - Unexpected Meeting

a few years later.. i decided to take a vacation.. i want to stop being in my own little world.. after being lectured by my mom, my family and my friends.. i decided to bring my mind at peace.. for what purpose i keep remembered that scene..? and him..? it just hurt me more and more..

and now.. i'm here.. alone.. at jeju island..

 a place that once i've been dreaming to go since i'm 16.. wow.. the scenery is not that bad.. it's awesome..! much more beautiful than in the drama.. the sea breeze really can make my heart at peace..

as i wandering down the street when i'm about to go back to the hotel.. i saw someone that look very familiar.. i came nearer.. oh no..! its Changmin..! and he's alone drinking a cup of coffee in that cafe..! what..? i really can't believe my eyes.. for 5 years i've been his fan.. but i stop because my boyfriend don't allow me to since we couple.. but now.. he's right in front of my eyes..! i don't need to think about that b***** who dumped me and cause me this huge pain.. even more.. he want me to stop be a fan.. seriously.. he didn't know how much i valued this treasure.. and he tell me to stop.. he said i'm just getting hurt if i continue to be his fan.. but now he's the one who hurt me most.. not Changmin..

i make up my mind to come closer to him.. i don't want to lose this precious oppurtinity.. i came towards him bravely..


"안녕하세요.. (anyeong hasaeyo) *hello*" i bravely approached him..
"안녕하세요.." he politely replied me and bow his head..
"urmm.. 당신은 혼자에요? (dangshineun honjaaeyo..?) *are you alone?*" i asked him.. afraid that i would be such a bother..
"네.. 하지만, 누구 ...세요? (nae.. hajiman, nugu..saeyo? *yes.. but, who are you?*"
i smiled happily.. he talked to me..! he talked to me..!!
"owh.. err.. 내가 liana 입니다.. (naega liana ibnida) *i am liana..* 난 당신의 팬이에요..!(nan dangshineui paeni aeyo) *i'm your fan..!*" with an excited voices of mine..
he smiled at me and said, " 감사합니다.. (kamsa hamnida) *thank you*" gratefully..
oh no.. he keep smiling as he talking with me.. =)
"한국 아라요? (hanguk arayo?) * do you understand korean?*" he asked me..
"err.. 한국 조금 아라요 (hanguk chogeum arayo) *i understand only a little korean..*"
"then never mind.. i understand english quite well.. just be natural with it.." he said.. maybe he noticed that i'm not too confident using korean.. hehe..
"owh.. okay.. can i have a picture with you..?" i asked him..
"sure.."
after we snap the picture.. i have one more favour to ask.. for sure.. i want his autograph..
"can i have your autograph too..?"
"okay.. give me your paper.."
i search all over in my bag.. i didn't have any blank paper.. i just have my diary.. but.. never mind.. let him sign on my diary.. this will be the most precious moment ever in my life..!

"how long you've been my fan..?" he asked me gently..
"hurm.. i know you since 2008.. for five years i've been your fan but then i stop...." err.. 'why did i mention about this..? pabo..~'
"may i know why did you stop..?"
silence.. i don't want him to know.. i don't want to talk about this matter anymore..
"it's okay if you don't want to tell.." he acting cool.. this is the Changmin that i known all this while..
"do you have a girlfriend right now..? i mean.. are you dating..? 여자 친구?? (yeoja chingu) *girlfriend* "
"nope.. i've been dumped a few years ago.. and i don't think i'm ready yet to find a new lover.."
"나도..(na do) *me too*"
"진짜..? (chincha..?) * really..?*"
"yes.. and maybe that is the reason that brought me here.. and maybe its my destiny to met you in this place.." i smiled bitterly..
and we started to chat with each other.. and i think we use banmal in our chat.. because i'm also not sure whether my korean is the polite one or not.. haha..


we have a chat as we've known each other for a long time.. but this is actually the first time i met him.. maybe he's being comfortable with me as i'm not like any other fan girls that only said compliments and such things.. =)
after a few hours of having a talk with him.. actually.. we didn't realized that we've been chatting about hours until Changmin noticed it..
" i never thought that  i will get to have a chat with you.." i said it happily..
"well.. we never sure about what will happen in the future too.. right..?"

then he looks at his watch.. seems like he have a schedule after this..
"are you busy..?" i asked him..
"hurm.. sorry.. i have a schedule after this.. do you want to come with me..?"
"어디에..(odiyeo) *where?*"
"MBC station.. there you'll meet all of my members.. i mean.. TVXQ.."
seriously..! my face turn red.. not beacuse i'm shy.. but because i'm too happy..!! kyaaaaa...!! my teenage-dream come true..!
"seeing your face.. i assume you'd agree.." he teased me..
"oppa.. for sure i'll agree.. i've been dreaming about this for such a long time.. nobody even thinks that i managed to fulfill this dream.."
"okay.. kaja..! *lets go..!*"





to be continued.. 

>> my wish list..

memandangkan birthday aku kurang dari sebulan dari sekarang.. ehem2.. kamu2 semua patut la take notes apa yang aku nak sebagai hadiah hari jadi aku nanti.. ngehehehe.. *gile x malu mintak hadiah kat orang..* peringatan..! semua bende yg aku mintak ni agak mengarut.. tapi kalau nk tunaikan tu tersangatlah digalakkan..

okay.. kita mula dengan yang masuk akal dulu yek..

1. birthday cake..!

demand: kene la kek yang cantik2 sikit mcm kt gmbr nih.. hehehe.. lagi bagus kalau itu kek secret recipe.. sebab aku pun bukan lah peggemar kek melainkan kek secret recipe.. ngehehehe.. tapi aku xnak la ek kalo kek tersebut bakal menjadi bahan 'pencemar alam semula jadi'.. hehe.. faham kan maksud aku nih..? aku xnak main kejar2 dengan kek.. okay.?

2. birthday cards..

 sebenarnye.. dah lame dah aku xdpt birthday cards nih.. rasanya sejak ada henpon kot.. pastu sekarang ni pun ade fesbuk.. huhuhu.. sume orang pilih jalan senang jek nk wish.. pastu nanti bila lama2.. wish2 tersebut hilang ditelan zaman.. mcm mane nk save..? henpon manjang jek full memory.. fesbuk pulak jenuh giler r n cari balik wish2 tahun2 lepas.. ye x..? so.. bagi la aku kad.. senang sikit aku nk simpan.. boleh tahan lama.. fyi.. the last birthday card i ever received was from my schoolmate.. Syazana.. ala.. simple2 pun xpe.. lagi aku hargai.. tapi kalau nk bagi yang fancy2 mcm kt kedai buku yg berlambak2 tu.. okay jugak.. ngehehehe.. =p

3. coklat cadbury mixed nuts..

diingatkan sekali lagi ye.. saya nk perasa MIXED NUTS.. huhuhu.. walaupun aku kadang2 tu makan kacang sampai gatal2.. i don't really sure i have an allergic to nuts.. tapi still aku gila suka la makan bende nih.. my favourite..! kalau anda terlebih baik hati nk belanja coklat mahal2 tu.. make sure rasa dia boleh beat rasa coklat nih.. okay..?

4. teddy bear..

yer.. tahun lepas mmg la dah dpt teddy bear.. tapi kali nk aku nk yg saiz dia mcm dalam gambar tu.. haha.. gile tamak kan aku nih..?  

5. album TVXQ-Keep Your Head Down

sebagaimana yang anda semua tahu.. saya ni peminat yang agak fanatik sikit kat TVXQ nih.. especially Changmin.. so.. belikan je la aku album baru dorg.. nk yg special edition taw..! sebab yg special edition tu ada photobook dgn postcard sekali.. dan postcard tersebut ikut nasib la.. dapat Changmin or Yunho.. aku xmampu nk beli sendiri.. hanya mampu nak mintak orang je.. huhuhu.. sedih kan..? 

6.fuji instax mini 7's

tak rasa ke comel giler kamera nih..? kan..? kan..? kan..? comel kan..? aku google.. harga dia RM248.. xsilap aku ni la kamera yang boleh cetak terus gambar lepas snap.. whoaah.. bayangkan.. tetibe jumpe mana2 artis xkisah la Malaysia or Korea.. terus tangkap gambar.. lepas gambar tu dh print out.. erus mintak dia autograph atas gambar tu.. kan best..? *mood berangan on* 

7. date with changmin

 kan best kalau ada someone arrange date aku ngan dia.. xpun.. bagi aku no phone dia pun jadik la.. hahaha.. at least boleh la kontek2 secara direct.. ngehehehehe.. 

okay x permintaan2 aku tadi..? i have 95% confidence interval that no. 4-7 will not be fulfilled.. hahaha.. paham sgt dah.. 

p/s: ini hanyalah gurauan semata2.. tapi still.. kalau nk bagi pun apa salahnya.. (^_^)v

[My Story] : Chapter 1- the break up

its been a while since he left me.. i don't know where did i do wrong.. i don't know.. i'm totally clueless.. he just left me like that.. and the scars in here feel like it will never be healed.. so deep.. and it's hurt..

since that day.. I've been wondering in my own little world alone.. yes.. alone.. i abandoned everyone around me.. feel like they never exist.. i do feel sorry to those who care about me.. but it just.. argh.. it's hard to tell.. really hard to tell.. and since that moment.. i promised to myself not to fall in love again..

working like there's no tomorrow.. its all my life about.. normal working hours start from 9 in the morning to 5pm.. but mine.. almost 24 hours a day..

*flashback*

its nine in the evening.. and its raining heavily.. he want to meet me at the park in this hour..? is he kind of insane..? hurm.. such a terrible timing.. but i still went there.. wearing white sweater, worn out jeans and black scarf.. really simple way of dressing.. this is me anyway.. with an umbrella on my left and i-phone at the other side.. oh gosh.. i kinda late for this..

when i arrived.. i saw two human figures from a far.. and i know who it is.. its him.. but who is the other one..? looks like a woman.. as i came nearer.. i recognized that woman.. she's my best friend..! what did she do with my boyfriend..? a lot of negative thought appeared in my mind.. but i didn't expect that my thought will be real..

"liana.. i'm so sorry.." he finally said something..
"what are you sorry for..?" i pretend like a dumb.. i know what is that means..  but i hardly can't accept it..
he so speechless.. the girl too..
"we're truly sorry.." they both said it together as i saw them holding each other hands.. what..? i'm kinda shocked.. in fact.. we.. i mean.. he and i never ever holding each other before.. he told me to protect my hijab.. and to control all of my actions.. he teach me how to be a good muslimah.. and i believe he is a good muslim too.. but now..? huh..?

"since when did you guys......." argh.. its hard for me to continue the sentences..
"we're married yesterday.." he said it calmly..

DUSH..!! married..? isn't it suppose we to get married next year..? and with my best friend..? i grinned my teeth as i control myself from crying.. i just  have thought that they're in a relationship behind my back.. never thought of them to get married behind my back.. and it is yesterday..? why all of sudden..??

i felt down on my knees.. feel like i have no more strength to lift up.. my umbrella was already touch the ground..  seriously.. why did this happen to me..? 'i cannot cry in front of him.. i cannot cry in front of him..!' i said to myself.. she wanted to lift me up.. but i don't have any strength to do that.. i cannot stand on my own feet..  it too sudden..!

sekadar gambar hiasan

after they'd gone.. i cry heavily as the rain falls.. my world seems so dark.. no lights.. even if they are a single stray of light.. its gone..!

*end of flashback*


to be continued...

>> bagaikan kaca pecah berderai..

salam.. cuba anda renung2kan.. masa bilakah yang anda akan rasa seperti gambar di atas..? i mean.. feeling too frustrated like the broken glass..? hurm.. to tell you the truth.. that is what i felt almost every day since the day i found out the truth about people around me.. so sad isn't it.. 

the most obvious reasons:

1. apabila seseorang yg aku lihat mcm ada potensi untuk membimbing aku pada masa akan datang telah mengecewakan aku.. senang cerita.. bila dia dah ada yang punya la.. kan..? masa yang paling menyakitkan adalah bila kita nampak sendiri event tersebut.. serius rasa mmg hancur luluh hati ni.. lepas tu terus jatuh 'saham' dia depan mata aku.. out of my list terus..  *byk la ko punye perasaan tu liana..! mcm la pernah tgk jek.. haha..* so in the end.. frust menonggeng sendiri.. ='(

2. bila rasa diri ini x dipercayai oleh semua orang.. lantas.. kepercayaan kepada diri sendiri pun berkurangan.. dah tu mula la tuh dok pikir mcm2.. nape la.. mcm mane la.. bla bla bla.. self confidence pun automatik terus low bawah tahap selesa.. 

3. bila rasa seolah2 keputusan yg aku buat tuh macam salah..

everyone deserve to decide which part they want to choose for their own life.. right..? so.. it's up to you which  way you want to lead your life.. tapi agak2 la beb kalo ko nk pilih jalan jahanam mcm amek bende bukan2 tuh.. fikir la waras sikit.. aku yg x berapa nak normal ni pun taw pikir mane baik mana buruk.. so pada sesiapa yg di luar sana tu.. kalo rasa diri anda nih terlalu dikongkong oleh ibu bapa or parents or family.. just think like this.. they love you so much.. they don't want you to choose the wrong path.. the very wrong path.. yeah.. sometimes we do make mistake.. it is what a life about anyway.. 

i love this quotes: 

but i love this even more..

sepatutnya kita perlu merasa diri ini lebih hina kalau buat benda2 yg bukan2..buat benda yang dilarang.. benda yang disuruh kita tinggalkan.. x rasa hina ke diri ini..? kalau x ikut cakap DIA.. padahal dah terang benderang dah tertulis kat Al-Quran mana yg halal mana yang haram.. senang cerita.. pada zaman moden mcm sekarang ni.. isu yg paling hangat adalah isu aurat, couple, pergaulan bebas, zina, dan sewaktu dengannya.. Alhamdulillah aku xde pakwe sampai sekarang walaupun dalam hati nih terasa mcm gatal nak sgt.. tapi kene pikir jugak baik buruk couple nih.. ade yang berpandangan niat menghalalkan cara.. which is i don't know how to offend.. yang pasal isu pergaulan bebas tuh.. hurm.. aku boleh ckp la kan.. sebab mostly member course aku adalah lelaki.. it just you have to control yourself.. jangan la gedik2 manja sgt.. kene pandai jaga diri.. 

sebenarnya.. aku tahu.. aku pun bukanlah baik sgt kan.. but at least i try to be a better person.. remember this:

"When Allah wants to favour somebody He tries him by putting him under some hardship. Abu Hurairah Radiyallahu 'anhu narrates that Rasulullah Sallallahu 'alaihi wasallam said: [Bukhari]"

so.. this is the best solution to those feelings.. the best medicine ever..! bila terasa hati ni bagai kan kaca pecah berderai.. ingat lah ALLAH.. DIA selalu bersama dengan hamba-NYA.. Yang Maha Pendengar, Yang Maha Pengampun lagi Maha Penyayang.. 

v(^_^)v

>> dahulu dan sekarang..

selalunya.. bila kita tgk balik gmbar2 sendir yg lama tuh.. mesti ade tergerak hati ckp.. 'oh.. betapa kurusnya aku dulu..' 'ish.. mcm mane la muke aku berbeza gile dari dulu sampai skrg ni..?' bla.. bla.. bla.. tapi pada aku.. aku rasa.. rupa aku yang dulu dengan rupa aku yg sekarang x jauh berbeza pun.. hurm.. ni pun kes 2 hari lepas aku selongkar balik gambar2 yang aku ada kat dalam laptop aku.. ngehehehe.. 

1992

aku rase la kan.. gmbr ni diambil masa aku setahun kot.. sebabnye aku dah pandai berdiri sendiri.. haha.. comel x aku time kecik2 dulu..? muka aku same je kan stay sampai sekarang..? ni maknenya aku ni baby-face..! hahahaha.. *perasan gilak..!* cuma dulu botak.. sekarang mcm mustahil la kan botak lagi.. haha.. family aku mmg mcm ni.. time baby je mmg xde rambut.. bila dah besar.. xyah nk ckp la.. rambut bukan maen lebat lagi.. hehe..

putri marissa (2011)

sama x muka aku dgn muka dia time kecik2..? hehehe.. persamaan yang ketara adalah kami kekurangan rambut..! kan..? hai.. bila lah rambut budak sorang ni nak panjang.. teringin aku nk tuncit2kan rambut dia.. haha.. =)

*picture from 1993-2006 are omitted because of i dont have it in my lappy.. plus malas nk cari balik.. peace.. (^_^)v*

a few years later.. or should i said a few decades later..? ah.. xmo la.. terase mcm tua pulak bila guna perkataan 'decades' tu.. haha..

2007

ni time kat MRSM Serting.. Form 5.. gmbr ni time aku tgh dok edit2 nk buat movie kelas.. ala.. tapi hasilnye bukanlah lawa sgt pun.. aku kan x kreatif sgt.. lagipun yg tu bukannye laptop aku.. poyo je lebih tu.. harap maklum.. ngehehe.. 

2008

 ni pulak masa kat tanjung bidara.. time belajar kat matrix dulu.. ayu x aku..? kahkahkah.. *gelak guling2..* gile ayu kan pegi pantai pun pakai baju kurung..? nak buat mcm mane.. aku kan budak yg tersangatlah 'skema'.. outing ikut peraturan.. mcm mane pergi mcm tu jugak la aku balik.. seingat aku.. aku xpernah pakai jeans kat matrix dulu.. baik kan aku nih..? *puji diri sendiri pulak..*

2009

 ni zaman dah masuk Universiti Malaya.. haha.. time ni la baru nk kenal dunia.. bak kata orang la kan.. hehe.. pesanan pihak penaja: xde sesiape ke yg nk volunteer bagi aku anak patung tuh..? cumeyl beb..! tapi jgn la pulak korg bagi aku monyet yg kat kolej 10 tuh.. mmg aku bunuh la sape2 yg bagi aku monyet tu nanti.. *aku rasa mcm aku dapat agak la sape yg ade idea nk bg bende2 cmtu.. haha..*

2010

ni pulak bile dah 2nd year kt UM.. lokasi femes budak2 UM x lain dan x bukan.. midvalley.. haha.. senang nk gerak.. hurm.. dari tahun lepas aku mintak.. tapi sampai sekarang xdpt2 pun lagi.. ehem2.. ni aku nk state lagi sekali untuk yg ke-198 kalinya.. aku nak teddy bear besar mcm tuh..!! huwaa..!! korang nih.. aku kene bagi sample gak kan..? hehe..

okay.. tu je la kot gmbr2 yg berjaya aku godek setakat nih.. hurm.. apa pandangan anda..? ade perbezaan x..? tersangatlah tidak begitu jauh perbezaannya kan..? nak kata aku makin gemuk.. atau makin kurus.. ye ker..? rase mcm xde perbezaan pun.. hahaha.. tapi.. ade satu perbezaan yg aku perasan la.. can you spot it..? hehehe.. =p